1st Women President

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Don’t forget to play the video.

 

You’re gonna love this!

I found this here: http://desperatehousewifesortof.blogspot.com/2008/06/be-prepared-to-laugh-your-butt-off.html.  I have to say the Dr. Suess one is my favorite.

Why did that chicken cross the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! That chicken wanted change!

 JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure – right from Day One! – that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn’t about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where’s my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can’t you people see the plain truth? That’s why they call it the ‘other side.’ Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like ‘the other side.’ That chicken should not be crossing the road. It’s as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

 

Potluck Thursday..or Wednesday

OK, so I have a little bit of everything today.

It’s one of those days when:

• You wrap your hair in your towel and go about putting on your makeup etc.  A few minutes later you need to wipe your hands on your towel and can’t figure out where it went.  It’s sad but true.
• You name your blog Potluck Thursday when it’s really Wednesday.  Or is it????
• You where khaki pants and a red shirt and inadvertently shop at Target that day.  Guess how many people come and ask you what aisle the toilet paper is kept?
• Your electric toothbrush stops (because you forgot to charge it!) and you stop and wonder what to do now!

For those of you who are interested in more homemade gifts I saw on the Women’s Day website 15 min crafts (now that’s for me!)

    visit:   http://www.womansday.com/article.asp?article_id=11396

For those interested I got a hair cut.  Why is this a big deal.  Well it’s been over a year and the tangles where driving me crazy (now what’s going to be my excuse?).  I feel 1o pounds lighter.  OK, maybe 2 🙂

TRAVEL TIPS:  These are from my lovely Aunt Diane.  

I have two travel tips which took me years to discover.

The shrinking suit case:

No matter what size suit case I have from a carry-on to a 32″ duffel bag, it is never big enough for the “stuff” I take. 

When I get to my hotel room, the clothes explode everywhere (I brought too much!!), getting them re-packed to leave is NOT fun because I am sure the suit case shrunk!!  One overseas three-week vacation, I needed to packed both fun and a wedding — too much stuff.  On a whim, I put every item in a zip-lock plastic bag (little ones and big ones).  I wear so much black I used a black marker to write “long black skirt”, “black butterfly top”, etc.  The rest I could see the item. 

This time clothing explosion was a piece of cake!! 

 

WOW, I got to the first hotel, rummaged through looking for one outfit, plastic bags of clothes flew everywhere.  When I found the ones I wanted for all the plastic bags were easily thrown back into the suit cases.  For three weeks I didn’t have the extra work of re-packing at each hotel and my room looked nice each day!!

 

Shampoo and Conditioner

In a snack size plastic bag, I put enough shampoo or conditioner for one hair washing.  In the shower, I open the plastic bag turn it inside out, rub the side of the plastic back with the shampoo on my hair, the throw the bag out.   No bottles that leak in flight and no space in the suit case is required.

And One Last Thought:                              

OK, so I have been wondering why if Hollywood is so open to ALL people how come I don’t think I would fit in.  Almost every article regarding Rachel Ray (whom I think is fabulous) deals with weight.  She is a size 6 for goodness sake!  The average size of women is 12 so why do they keep addressing this as if she is not small?  And heaven forbid you are conservative or a Christian.  I just read an article, while getting my hair cut, and Patricia Heaton gets death threats because of her conservatism and Christian beliefs.  She also believes that she may not get another shot if this new show of hers (which I haven’t watched) doesn’t work because of her beliefs and the criticism she gets from the Hollywood crowd.  I don’t understand.  I guess I don’t have the right dress size to understand!

Bye For Now,

Debbie aka The Real World Martha